Anxiety

Separation anxiety is a normal part of child development, but it can make you, as a parent, feel bad or guilty for leaving your child to go to work, enjoy a night out, or run errands. Babies usually develop separation anxiety between the ages of eight months and one year old. It may last until your child reaches elementary school or longer if your child develops a more severe anxiety disorder.

Children who don’t want their parents to leave may cry, scream, cling to you, and/or throw tantrums. Here are some tips that might help you and your child deal with separation anxiety.

1. If at all possible, don’t introduce your baby to a new daycare or care provider/baby-sitter between the ages of eight months and one year of age, the age which separation anxiety typically develops.

2. Practice leaving your baby for short periods of time. Leave your baby with a baby-sitter or other caregiver for a short period of time so that both you and your baby can get used to the idea of being apart from each other.

Additionally, if you are going to start your child at a new daycare, visit it a couple of times before he or she actually needs to spend a full day there. You might also want to leave your child there for a short period of time before he or she starts at the daycare full-time so he or she can get used to the people there and being away from you.

If you need to leave your child with a baby-sitter or relatives for an extended period of time, such as a weekend or a few days, invite the caretaker over to spend time with you and your child so your baby can get used to the care provider before you have to be away.

3. If you tell your child what time you’ll be back, it is extremely important that you are back by that time. This will help reduce your child’s anxiety regarding being apart from you and will build his or her trust in the fact that you are coming back.

4. Take your child to the baby-sitter’s or daycare after a meal or naptime, if it is possible. Your child may be more anxious about you leaving if you try to leave him or her when he or she is hungry, tired, or particularly moody.

5. Give your child your full attention when you are leaving. Remind him or her that you will be back and specify a time that he or she will understand. Tell your child, for instance, that you will be back after naptime or after lunch. Tell your child that you love him or her and remain calm, even if your child is throwing a temper tantrum. When you say you are leaving, leave. As much as your child will try to pull at your heartstrings by crying or calling after you, don’t come back because it will make the behavior and the situation worse.

Separation anxiety is difficult for both parents and kids. I hope these suggestions help you help yourself and your child through it.

Source:

Kids Health: Separation Anxiety

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